My day started out fine, actually. I woke up early with a sweet kiss from my husband, prepared healthy breakfast, showered, drove to work and came on time.
Hours later, I received a random call from Saz who delivered some bad news. Inevitable as I thought, anxiety rushed all over me and I just couldn’t make him feel better so I calmed myself down and told myself not to dwell on it and decided to put down the phone for things to simmer down a little. (Besides, its bad for the baby!)
I felt tears welling up and no minute later, they started to fall. I felt worried and plain heavy, my heart was pounding twice as fast and nothing else could make me feel better until I led myself to a short prayer.
One factual thing? God listens. God knows what you need even before you ask and the rest of the hours have been a solid proof of that without a doubt. And the best thing? God answers- through words, through loved ones, through random people.
I saw a notification from 'Message from God' and clicked the button to see what God’s words were for me for the day and it read:
"…you have to face your problems however difficult they are".His words obviously hit me and I was sort of re-energized and thought that He’s just there to carry me through- I just have to face the day with complete surrender and trust and courage. I thanked God after reading that.
After lunch, an office staff came to our area with a baby boy in tow. An adorable, sociable baby boy who lifted my spirit. And I thanked God for that.
Shortly after, I got a random call from sir Isaac, one of our sales directors in the office who happens to be the “grandfather” of everyone in the office. He rang me to ask what flavor of ice cream I wanted in Dairy Queen.
What a blessing, indeed. Small gestures pull my heartstrings. And I thanked God once again.
But God indeed is the best giver even to the undeserving- my best friend Sab sent me words of encouragement, a prayer that lifted me up and a reversal of attitude took place. Best of all, I realized I am not alone in carrying my crosses.
Often times, we fail to look beyond all sorts of problems and challenges. But our Lord has His ways of touching us and leading us back to Him no matter what.
Through random calls, exchange of messages between you and a good friend, words of encouragement, a cup of ice cream, a sweet smile of a little baby- all instrumental to His unconditional love and overflowing grace.
And at the end of it all, we give nothing but thanks to the Mighty One.
Today, I’ve found my answer.
What am I doing with my life? What career do I really want to pursue? Am I in the right company? What’s my vocation? What’s my calling?
If you have at least one of the questions above lingering in your head for a while now, then don’t you worry, you’re not alone.
I am just like you.
In fact, I’ve got all of the above circling in my head like a bothersome headache, which no type of paracetamol can cure.
Today, I read an article from RELEVANT- an online magazine on faith, culture and intentional living. Title is “What’s God’s Will For Me?” and it’s basically tackling one’s so-called ‘struggle’ to find God’s calling. While I find this quite an easy feat for people who are burning with fervor in their chosen fields, I think there are some lads and lasses like me, who are equally passionate people, yet generally unsure of their decisions or simply downright insecure and cowardly to make the next big one.
And for all of us, we consider this whole experience nothing else but a long, dark tunnel we’re too afraid to cross.
But at one point in our lives, this unbeaten path becomes unbearable NOT to cross. We find ourselves on the crossroads of our lives and the pain of not taking action just slowly kills our freewill. And I don’t wanna fall into the pit of passiveness.
Just when I’m ready to pack my bags for a life trek, today, I find myself realigning my expectations. Today I realized that maybe, just maybe.. the answer is nowhere tangible- that we may never be able to figure it out in our lifetime. What if we’ll never get the answer we’re looking for? What if our calling was never meant to be unearthed to us in exact, measurable ways?
It could be a huge slap on the face, I know. Could God trick us this way? Are we merely puppets who are unable to make life decisions for a directed, well-planned and envisioned future?
I believe not. I believe that we’re entirely in control by and with faith. And perhaps, at least for me, the answer is the struggle itself- the everyday decisions, the small feats and failures, the amalgam of yes and no’s, right and wrong and the grey area. Everything. Everything accounts for God’s plan. Everything in our lives yesterday, tomorrow or even today, is part of God’s well-orchestrated plan for all of us. The day-to-day struggle is our very own beautiful walk in and with Christ.
And you know what’s beautiful about this struggle? The answer is entirely on our hands. We only have to trust God with our lives, every single day with every decision we make- big or small, right or wrong.
With this, I want to end with a short prayer:
Lord, let my will align with Yours. Time to wear some spiritual Nikes on.
Down in the dumps? Worry not, God has a bigger plan for you far better than you can ever imagine.
When my mom was diagnosed w/breast cancer, I was devastated. Of all moms, of all the people in the world (and this may sound selfish of me), why her? Why MY mom? A lot of questions came running in my head- I was so anxious and worried. Financially, I knew how it would have been difficult, even close to impossible, to sustain all the medication and hospital bills by ourselves. Or at least by my dad who was, and still is, the bread winner of the family.
I was troubled until I surrendered EVERYTHING to Him. I kept praying while everyone around me stormed the gates of heaven with their prayers. I felt so blessed and loved that not even a single worry bothered me since I entrusted mom’s life to my Lord. The money in the bank account for mom’s medication racked up by anonymous givers. People were so generous and supportive and believe me.. I saw dad cry in our porch some nights; but never did he show a single tear in front of me and my mom. I’ve never seen him break down until then. Through it all, he became stonger for the family. It was the first time I ever saw his love and care for mom through the little things he did for her. He juggled work and attending to mom’s needs- he’d stay overnight at the hospital and would drive himself to work the next day. He’d drive for mom to and from St.Luke’s for chemotherapy. He was clearly out of his comfort zone- everyone was, including me.
There was a time when I’d help bathe mom after her operation every single day, clean her wounds (boy I had to overcome my fear of blood), cook food for everyone, clean the house, drive for her in the middle of school. None of those I could have ever done without God’s provisions.
I saw His grace transform my family, especially my dad. He gave mom her second life. I grew stronger and better as a daughter and as a person because of this experience. It was indeed a testimony of God’s love. And to this date, I remember how he orchestrated everything with utmost love. It was difficult, but our faith was bigger than our challenges. To this day, I still could feel the pangs of misery and pain but the blessings were so abundant it embraced all aches- outweighed all difficulty.
Now, I remember, God indeed was up to something… and here I am- with a bigger heart and stronger disposition to face any hardship thrown at me.
Fantastic answer. I’m so proud of her! Go Philippines!
True Beauty = True Faith
Miss Universe 2011 Q&A:
Fox: “Would you change your religious beliefs to marry the person you love? Why or why not? “
Supsup: ” If I had to change my religious beliefs, I will not marry the person that I love. Because the first person that I love is GOD who created me. And I have my faith and my principles. And these what makes me who I am. And if that person loves me, he should love my God too, Thank you.”
Ms. Shamcey Supsup is an epitome of a woman beautiful from the inside out. She put her faith first, and for that, she is someone I truly look up to. She is a powerful reminder to all of us women, and men alike, that God is and should always be our first Love. I firmly believe that the greatest beauty any woman can possess is strong faith, and a deep relationship with the Lord.
3rd Runner Up or not, she is a proud Princess of the King of the Universe, and that is where her true victory lies.
Thank you for being an inspiration to all us women, Ms. Shamcey Supsup. Congratulations for bringing pride not only to our country, but above all, to our One True King.
“Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.” Proverbs 31:30
Something to smile about.
I read from one of the tumblr blogs i follow that the Lord assures us of answers to our questions- no matter how trivial, no matter how many.
Amidst the cloud of uncertainty in my life right now, I find peace in my heart and trust that He will show me the answers in the right and perfect time. This makes me worry less because I know that things will fall into place once we set aside our doubts and fully surrender everything to Him. The -ber months have finally arrived and 2011 will sure fly by fast without us noticing it’s another year again.
Hmm. I guess what I’m saying is that let’s make the most out of what we have left this year! Being in Robinsons for more than a year has definitely taught me irreplaceable lessons. Yes, I may not be getting the ideal, most enticing salary (which I always fuss over, Saz can attest to that) but on a brighter side, despite that I’m learning to still rack up my savings and budget my money, which I believe will be very useful when I start my own family. I’m also learning to manage stress better than ever before; I’ve learned to be stronger in dealing with disrespectful brokers who almost bully me around to get what they want (because I’m (was) too nice). I could go on and on but basically, my year-long experience has been more importantly about character-building. And i need that. Admittedly, I am pretty weak in managing stress and I don’t normally trust myself in handling bigger responsibilities (yes, self-doubt at times, i get that), but my experiences here have certainly paved way for me to work on it.
And i heave a sigh of relief.
Let’s keep the faith, let’s hope for the best. This is to a fruitful month ahead!
Today, im reminded that no challenge escapes me.
It’s another rough patch in my life, i admit and oh boy you cannot imagine how many times i’ve had it for 23 years. I can’t help but feel troubled and exhausted. In times like this, however, I am tasked to stay focused. I’m told to stay strong and hopeful. And I’m taught to remain faithful.
I hope you can pray for me, whoever you are reading this. And i pray you don’t ever lose hope when you feel like you’re enveloped with what seems to be an endless struggle.