What does one go through when he searches for and freely chooses to immerse himself in hardship?

Someone just recently opened up that he’s never ever had that down-in-the-dumps, stuck-in-a-rut, life-sucks-i-want-to-give up kind of situation. Iyong talagang life knocks you down. Teleserye level, kung baga. I mean, I believe whatever life brings, it’s one’s disposition and character that influence his decisions; thus, somehow determining the outcome. Life throws you a bad breakup? You either sulk over it forever start slashing your wrists, or you welcome the hurt for a while, accept it, and move on.

No matter how many or immense these hardships are, you’ll still come out as the person you want to be. The choice is yours to make.

And I don’t believe in looking for hardship because it just comes. And I believe I should just let my life take its course and let things unfold on their own.

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Speaking of hardship, onto a personal (maybe a totally unrelated) experience.

My dad and another client were conversing over coffee one time and my dad was sharing how he want us to learn on our own and be independent so we can value the life we have now and the woman tells him: “As much as I want my children to learn by going through hardships, I don’t want them to go through the same life I had gone through.” (Since they were once from the barrio who had to walk a little over 5 kilometers to school, and once alien college students in Manila who juggled janitorial/clerical work with academics just to graduate and struggled with a worn-out pair of shoes just to keep up with the expenses)

I did understand her point. As parents, you’d always wish for a better life for your children. You wouldn’t want them dragging a pair of worn-out shoes to school like you once did. You wouldn’t want them feeling they’re left behind or anything along those lines.

With that, I am grateful for having a decent, comfortable life now. As much as I can easily ask help from my parents to fulfill my wants and needs, I always try to choose to make it on my own and not waste their hard-earned money for whims and fleeting things. Sure, I never dragged a worn-out, unbearable-to-walk-in pair of shoes to school nor did I have to do janitorial work alongside academics, but I’m still scared that these things will have to happen in the future- if not to me, to my children.

I think I’m getting you lost now. This entry has become incohesive- pretty much a mesh of scattered thoughts, which I think perfectly describes my life right now.

I just want to share that I feel like wanting to hasten my “preparations”, if you may, for the future. I have been saving, but if I want to be married in 4-5 years and start a family, I don’t think I’m doing it at a right pace and working in the right space. Haha for sake of making it rhyme, diva!

Oh well, maybe nothing ever really comes easy. And I have to be comfortable with that idea.

P.S. I think I’m too anxious, I should be in this whatever-floats-the-boat stage, I’m too young to worry and even think about these things!!!!